Threshold of Promise

surferI feel hands on my back pushing me into expectation
Like when a group of friends pushes you into that boy you’ve been crushing on and whispering about
but never talk to
The fear of rejection and disillusionment anchors my feet to the floor
I’m leaning my body weight against the forward movement
Better to not know
Better to live the dream only in my mind
Than face the possibility of hope deferred
My heart has been broken and bleeding too many times this past season
My eyes are dried of tears
To bleed again for the cause of faith and hope sounds valiant
But my zeal is very low
A life among the ordinary appeals to my desire for rest and safety
but I’ve burned all those bridges

And so here I stand
On an island
The only way forward is through the ocean
The waves are frightful
But I have no where else to go
My ship back to safety and comfort has already sailed
I’m looking into your vastness
I’m afraid to be consumed

But I feel a hazy sense of resurrection
It’s tingling underneath my skin
New life?
Maybe just maybe I do have the energy to rise again
To take my board and surf the waves of promise no matter how many times I’m wiped out by the waves of misplaced trust

These hands on my back feel comforting
I sense love in these hands
But what about when they stop pushing me
And there I stand
In Your presence
What will I say to You?
What will be Your response?
I’m told You’ve been whispering about me as well
But I haven’t heard many of those whispers for myself

I’m nervous
Could this be it?
I’m taking a deep breath
I’m looking up into Your eyes
And smiling

January 3, 2016


Thoughts and Emotions


It’s interesting how thoughts and emotions collide and combat.

Thoughts knows she has all the right answers. She holds in her hands the sword of absolute truth. She believes she is invincible. She holds her head high, full of assurance. She need not even bed down to look at her opponent. For who can take her throne?

But though she looks strong in exterior, can she actually stand against the tidal wave of emotions?

For emotion comes by the sea. She comes with strength in her waves and she pounds against all walls meant to keep her at bay.

Again and again she attacks thoughts’ defenses.

A crack is found.

And with one final blow she pours into and out of the city.

Thoughts doesn’t relinquish all power, but with broken down defenses, she has no choice but to let emotions finish her damage before she begins to rebuild.

The strength of both forces lies within reality.

Both are real.

They carry weight.

If one were to deny the strength of the other, she would surely be brought to destruction.

The truth is they need each other.

They may seem like enemies, but actually they can be the best of friends. They can enhance and multiply the work of the other or they can destroy it with a few quick blows.

Neither is perfect.

Both need training.

Both need renewing by the Spirit.

He is their tutor, their coach. At times He focuses His training on the individual, but ultimately His work is to unite them in one powerful force. That together they would be like Himself. Bringing life where there was only violence and death.

Emotions, you are powerful. You come at surprising times bringing waters of life and healing.

Thoughts, your leadership is needed. Your structures are built with intelligence and skills that are necessary for growth and maturing.